Perspective

One of my reasons for coming on the World Race was to gain perspective. 

I can honestly say I have received so much perspective! I now have experienced first hand different cultures, different people, different food and have gleaned so much wisdom and life long awareness to the world around me.

I also learned that there is no “off” of being an adult and having responsibilities. Through some tough questions I have asked myself, in some ways this year was earmarked for me to take my foot off the pedal and coast. Shortly after training camp started I was assigned a role on our squad which was the perspective I didn’t want but desperately needed. I was put in charge, alongside some other beautiful souls, of logistics. That is essentially getting my squad of 29 to and from every country, and finding housing for our debriefs. This role has been challenging and tough and frustrating at times but it helped me have skin in the game. It helped me realize that no matter what I do, whether it’s behind a desk in a corporation or if its sharing Jesus’ love around the world, there is no “off” switch. 

The off switch I was searching for turns out to be in the 10 commandments and something that I’m supposed to practice regularly and keep holy, sabbath. This has been a really cool life lesson learned on the race. The perspective that we serve and work out of our rest is something that is not taught in America. But it’s essential. On the race, I have learned to love my sabbath days and have figured out how to delight in the Lord and learn what that looks like in its different forms. Some sabbaths are full of watercoloring, napping, eating, and watching movies; while others are full of community and exploring the places around me; and even still some look like working out, showers, and reading in a coffee shop for hours on end. Sabbath is different for everyone but it is for everyone. 

Through delighting in the Lord I have also learned a new perspective of who God is and what my faith is. I left 11months ago with many questions and can honestly say I have probably a million more but I have learned how important it is to have safe community to flesh those things out and to help ask even deeper things. I have loved having people push me to remain in the True Vine of Jesus and His words. Even in my questioning, God has been gracious and hasn’t left me just because I don’t understand everything. 

Also through 6 extremely different ministries I have learned a different point of view for what a missionary looks like. It can be a stay at home mom homeschooling her children, it can be a church plant, it can be a program that supports the community instilling the gospel in children’s lives, it can be painting a church building, teaching english, or working on a business that supports missions work locally. It’s not only building ramps for people or installing water systems, although that is also ministry. My view on mission work was very small previous to this trip and now the possibilities of working for the Kingdom is ENDLESS.

The most recent perspective I was faced to learn was that of how death is inevitable and how fleeting life is. I received the call that changed it all at 2:30am on May 2nd (in my time zone), I was told that my Dad had a heart attack and within the next 36 hours I had feet on the ground in North Carolina from Madaba, Jordan. 

I didn’t rashly decide this, it was a prayerful decision but I knew that Madaba, Jordan would always be available for a visit, but my Dad would not always be around for me to visit. Luckily my Dad recovered fully and I do get to visit him many more times but I learned the perspective of valuing people over experiences in that defining moment. 

Not only did this year and my Dad’s heart attack teach me how short life is but it also taught me that I don’t have to live life like people think I “should”. My favorite thing to remind people is to not “should” on yourself. And yet I found myself doing that very thing (and still am even after the race). I was worried what people thought I should be doing on this trip (especially if they gave financially), what my teammates thought I should do daily spiritually and physically, what the world was telling me that I should be doing in my early 30’s etc. 

I realized that at the end of the day I have to answer to the Lord my God, and at the end of my life I also will only answer to Him. So why am I so worried about what I “should” be doing according to everyone?!? I am shifting my focus on what I am doing for and with the Great I AM. I don’t want the American Dream, I want the God Dream, the one that is bigger than anything I could think, ask or imagine! I’m trying to go up-stream, not follow the status quo, stay punk & counter cultural. What a wildly different perspective.